Pregnant with Light

At the threshold of the new year, I am positively filled up with the Love and grace that saturated my holiday season.

This year, my Hanukkah celebrations were punctuated with attending Boulder's menorah lighting ceremony where hundreds of Jews gathered together to sing the haunting, warm melody of the Hanukkah blessing. It was a moment of awe that reached into my bones. I shared homemade latkes and applesauce with loved ones. And I lit candles in complete darkness during the windy power outages, meditating reverently while taking in their light as they gently flickered and burned.

December was also a time of tremendous confrontation with my shadow. After many such confrontations, I have been comforted greatly by this teaching from Dr. David R. Hawkins:

"Those who dedicate themselves to peace and love automatically pull up from the unconscious all that is cruel, unloving, and hateful to be healed." (I: Reality & Subjectivity, pg.24)

Paraphrasing, Dr. Hawkins also offers that the Self, our inner Teacher, only brings up from the unconscious that which we are capable of handling. Finding strength in these teachings, this month has been a powerful exercise in patience, non-judgment, faith, and renewed commitment to the qualities of the heart that have been my guides through treacherous waters.

This past month was also characterized by the overwhelming joy that flowed from my worship and exultation of the Light that was born into this world on Christmas. There are so many hymns, poems, songs, and "Gloria in Excelsis Deo!"s that speak to the true essence of this holiday. In particular the third verse of Silent Night spoke strongly to me this year:

Silent night, holy night,

Son of God, love's pure light.

Radiant beams from Thy holy face,

With the dawn of redeeming grace,

Jesus, Lord, at Thy birth,

Jesus, Lord, at Thy birth. 

As did this incredible poem by St. John of the Cross

"If You Want"

If you want, the Virgin will come walking down the road

pregnant with the Holy and say,

“I need shelter for the night.

Please take me inside your heart,

my time is so close.”

Then, under the roof of your soul,

you will witness the sublime intimacy,

the divine, the Christ, taking birth forever

as she grasps your hand for help,

for each of us is the midwife of God,

each of us.

Yes, there, under the dome of your being,

does creation come into existence eternally,

through your womb, dear pilgrim, the sacred womb of your soul,

as God grasps our arms for help:

for each of us is His beloved servant

never far.

If you want,

the virgin will come

walking down the street,

pregnant with Light,

and sing.

I pray that your year ahead is filled with blessings, and I give thanks for the blessing of your interest in the musings of my heart. It's my joy to share them with you.

Warmly,

Jacob